WELCOME TO CIRCULAR LETTERS

Good afternoon, my name is Basmati Kasaar. I suffer from rare and deadly diseases, bad grades, extreme babbles, fear of being kidnapped, and being executed by anal execution after being found guilty of sending me 50 billion fucking chain letters, which I got from people who actually believe , that if the letters are passed on, a poor six-year-old girl from Nepal, who grew up on her head, to collect enough money, to remove her before the parents of the villagers sell to the local circus as a freak.
Do you really believe that Bill Gates will donate 1,000 dollars to you and to anyone else who has forwarded his "e-mail"? How can you be so stupid? Woohoo, watch this. If you continue to send and watch your wish, I will sleep with all the pieces from the last issue of Playboy! What a bunch of shit.
Inspiration, this message is one big FOR ALL people who have nothing else to do but send a stupid chain lettere. Perhaps the virtual dwarfs will come to my apartment and rape me over the night because I have not continued the chain of happiness that began 5 years after Christ, who brought Romanian prostitutes into our country, carrying him in a bridge across the border in order to escape all the controls, and if that same chain continues until 3000, he will enter the Guinness Book of Records as the longest period of extreme nonsense.
Who fucks them. People, if you really need to forward such things, try to be at least a bit fun or funny. I've seen tons of chains of the type "send this to an e-mail of 50 of your friends, so one poor and crippled soul will get 50 dem from a generous, rich person." I'm not interested in that. Use a little bit of your brain and consider what you actually achieve and who gets the benefit or damages from sending tons of such e-mails. It's a great chance you get - NEpopularity.
THREE BASIC CHAIN ​​LETTERS:
LANAC TYPE 1:
. . . Make a wish!!! No, really, imagine one wish !!! Do it, or you will never come out with your sympathy !!! Imagine something else !!! ... Not that, a pervert! Was your finger tired? STANI !!! Was not this fun? :) I hope you will want to fill in :) Now, to feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First and foremost, if you do not send this email to 8035 e-mail address in the next 5 seconds, you will be scolded by a wretched wart pig, and then you will be thrown out of the soliter on a pile of old iron. It's true!! But, watch out, this letter is not as bad as the rest of this guy you get! THIS PAPER IS TRUE !! Really!!! Here's the rules:
* Send this email to 1 person: 1 person will be pissed at you because you sent her a stupid chain letter.* Send this email to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed at you because you sent them a stupid chain letter.* Send this email 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed at you because you sent them a stupid chain letter, and will launch a plot against you and your family.* Send this email 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed at you because you sent them a stupid chain letter, and they will light your house. Thank you and happy !!!!
LANAC TYPE 2:
Good afternoon, and I would first like to thank you for taking a few minutes to read this e-mail. There is a starving boy who lives in Dungorutiglopertominisku, and he has no hand, no legs, no parents ....
* Stormy story number 1: Go home, squeeze it on the edge and fall into the sewer through an open saht in the sea of ​​shit. After they managed to pull it out, it smelled disgusting, but that was not all. She died later. Be careful not to happen to you!* Scary story number 2: Morik Blip, a 13-year-old boy got this letter on his email but ignored him. Later, during the same day, he and his lover struck the car as they sat up holding hands. They both died and went to Hell, where they were condemned to eat cuddles by the end of Eternity. Be careful not to happen to you! You could end up like Mtunda or Morik. Simply send this email to all your friends and everything will be fine.
LANAC TYPE 3:
Here's a song I've composed. Send it to all your friends:
Friends
A friend is the one you can always rely onA friend is one who loves you, although he smells like shit, and stinks from your mouth as if you were eating cat food.A friend is the one who loves you, even if you're ugly as a scarfA friend is the one who cries for you when you get drunk.A friend is the one who stays with you, although you just sneak into your fucking stupid and boring lifeA friend is one who pretends to love you, although in fact he thinks that it would be best for you to rape crazy orangutans and then toss you with bloodthirsty dogs.A friend is the one who cleans your toilet, dusting your living room and paying your bills.A friend is the one who sends you chains of happiness in the hope that his desire will come true.
Forward this letter! If you do not, you will never have a girlfriend !!!


Forward this letter! If you do not, you will never have a girlfriend !!!

Conclusion? If you receive an e-mail that threatens to happen to you or make you unhappy, delete it. If it's fun, send it away. Do not be angry with people by giving them a bite of conscience for the Botswana typhoid who has no teeth, who takes care of elephants for the last 27 years of his life, whose last rescue is 5 cents that he gets every time someone clicks forward and threatens them will end up like Mtunda or Morik. E, now send this to everyone in the next 3 seconds. Otherwise, something will happen to you.

And never, you're never, you will not make love.

TEN The worst cars of all time

Car Talk showers at the US National State Radio (NPR) recently conducted a survey among their listeners, drivers and car enthusiasts, urging them to vote for the worst cars of this millennium. Here's how they ranked "clutter", and there are some cynical comments which owners could not hold back when voting.
To our regret, the absolute winner of this grinning contest is our "Jugo", which was sold in America from 1986 to 1991.


YUGOSLAV: One owner of our "Yugo" said with bitterness: "At least his glass is heated, so your hands will always be warm as you push it."
SEVROLET "VEGA" (American, 1971-1977): "As far as I can estimate, it was made from compressed russia", it was a sarcastic comment by one owner.
FORD "PUNTO" (American, 1971-1980): "I drove him to a shopping center in a crime-free area and left him unlocked with the keys in the lock. When I returned a few days later, the car was, to my urgency, more was there, "said one lucky owner of this model.
AMC "GREMLIN" (American, 1970-1978): "This car has all the traits and advantages of a cheap tractor ...". "Mildly, it looks like a pregnant skater skater".
SEVROLET "SEVET" (American, 1976-1987): "It's a four-piece gypsum engine." "If I could manage to get the highway with someone not overtaking me, the car would slowly gain acceleration. After about an hour I would reach 90 kilometers an hour." "Well then, it would start shaking ...".
RENO "LE KAR" (French, 1977-1983): "You would be in mortal danger if you experience a collision with something bigger than a bow". "Our car was not able to overcome the hill, so the passengers had to go out and pedestrians."
DODZ "ASPEN" / PLIMUT "VOLARE" (American, 1976-1980): These two related cars are highlighted by the fact that their former owners remember the most. "The problem of stagnation is so great that I had to get to work in the clockwise direction so I could turn right at any moment, so that I would not accidentally lean on the left turn and block traffic."
SIMARON (USA, 1982-1988): "Unmatched, this is the worst car for your money." "When we took it, my wife was angry that we did not hold him long enough to have time to buy a gun and shoot him."
RENO "DOFIN" (French, 1957-1966): "Truly unprecedented by the technical construction". "The bicycle that would pass beside would drown my Dofin".
FOLKSVAGEN "BUS" (German, 1950-1979): "There is no heating in it - that is, if auxiliary heater is not ignored." "Flower stickers were the only thing that this car was holding on the crowd."

lawyers

The Massachusetts Bar Associate Lawyers Advocate, at the beginning of this year, released twenty authentic questions put to witnesses during court hearings. Here's what American lawyers have asked.
"Tell us the doctor, is it true that when a person dies in a dream, he is not aware of it in the morning?"
"Your youngest son, twenty-one year old, how old is he?"
"Were you present when they photographed you?"
"Were you alone or was there nobody?"
"Have you or your young brother been killed in the war?"
"Did he kill you?"
"How many vehicles were distant at the time of the collision?"
"You were there until you left, right?"
"How many times did you commit suicide?"
- "So the baby started on August 8th?"- "Yes.""And what did you do at that point?"
- "She has three children, right?"- "Yes."- "How many boys are there?"- "No one."- "A girl?"
- "Do you say the stairs lead down to the basement?"- "Yes.""And can these stairs rise up?"
- "Mr. Slatery, you were on a fairly long honeymoon, were not you?"- "Yes, I was staying in Europe, sir."- "Have you brought a young woman with you?"
- "How did your first marriage end?"- "Death."- "And whose death is?"
- "How would you describe that person?"- "It was medium height, with a beard."- "Was it a man or a woman?"
- "Doctor, how long did you do the autopsy on the dead?"- "I do all my autopsies on the dead."
- "All your answers must be verbal, understand? In which school did you leave?"- "Oral."
- "Do you remember how many hours were you examining the body?"- "The autopsy started about half past nine in the morning.""And Mr. Dennington was dead at that time?"- "No, he sat at the autopsy table and wondered why he needed an autopsy."
- "Are you qualified to give a sample of the urine?"- "I'm qualified from my early age."
- "Doctor, before you joined the autopsy, did you check the pulse?"- "Not."- "Have you checked blood pressure?"- "Not."- "Did you check your breathing?"- "Not.""So it's possible that the patient was still alive when you started the autopsy?"- "It is not possible."- "How can you be so sure, Doctor?""Because his brain was in the jar of formalin on my desk."- "But is not it possible for the patient to still be alive?""It is possible that he is alive, and that he is dealing with a lawyer today."

You're Chef

When an organism was created, all organs wanted to be the Safe.

The brain said: "Since I manage all parts of the body, I will be the Safe"

The legs said: "Since we carry an organism where Mozak wants and does everything that is ordered, we need to be a Safe."

They also expressed the same desire to Eyes, Hands, Hearts and Pluca ... All organs wanted to be a Safe.

At last, Dupa also said she wanted to be a Safe.

Everyone laughed and said that it was absurd - that one ass was Safe. Dupe insulted, collected and refused to do his job, which caused far-reaching consequences: The brain got shaken, the Eyes cracked, the legs began to snap, the hands began to shake, and the Heart and the Pluca had great difficulties in performing their functions.

In the end, they all begged the Brain to allow Dupa to be Safe.

So it was. Now they all normally perform their tasks and functions, while Dupe just sits down and shakes.

lessons:

In order for a person to become a safe, he should not be a genius, it's enough to be an ass.

Stupid Tuesday

(Confession of the beloplatanac participant "contramitation" by Dragan Ujevac in the Serbian language, ie in Serbian Yiddish, without translation into the literary Serbian)
Until now, I thought I was dealing with something with this head, but now I see that I do not understand anything. Something weird time is coming, so everything is blurred; She does not know what the sludge will be, and what will swim in the water. And nothing is dispersed yet. I do not pretend much about this brain and tell you how to say it. Bese tornik. A stupid day. They do not say that they are fools, in our village in Belo Palanka, for someone "stupid is a tornik". It's stupid and Monday, but the tornik is so stupid. And on that day, they set up a rally in Belgrade. Let's support this Naseg. And will they bring us together? On the game, at the cattle market. Kobajagi is a nice place for all peasants know di cattle market. If it goes, the bus "Nis Express", inter-urban, wooden chairs. All right, let's sit on wooden stools to Belgrade. Just to support this Naseg that was attacked by Vuk and DJindjic, I want this Nas voted for the vote and elections. Some of the scores will come from Daca from Moscow to go on our way to a myth. That's what I'm saying, if Daca from Moscow can come for this Naseg, I can come from Belo Palanka. And I have a job at home, not that I have nothing to do with my house.
Dress in clean and warm. The woman from the parmans coffin pulled out the louse from my wedding. I'm marrying her in her, she'll get me. And the coat of clothes from the wedding. I'm tight, lying, I can not run. But I'm ecclesiastical and deadly.
Dojdo sobsle at cattle market. A lot of the world has gathered. I know him, I do not know, whether they are who they are. Must be the peasants from the villages, their asss for their daily allowance. When you see the pence of dinars, is it a little ?! Dosl and Sale, president of Belopalan. And he will go. And the stranger and the one of Kosta Krivosija who bumped his head as a gadar. He will tell us to quit: "We love you free!". You "We are Slobini, It's Our Freedom!". All the same as '45. for Tito we were staying in front of the Remiziana Hotel. And now they say, Nemanja will not be the leader of the road! What is Nemanja? When he went to the prekomanda, he passed through Belgrade with the camions. Well, I had to know where to get something to fuck. And it's all so hard. Come on, let's talk to you in line.
We crawl into a bus as a cattle; Everyone is pushing to sit down to the window. I do not know how we are this people, to fuck him! If we fight for a place on the bus. And what can I see: It does not have a dog from Moscow. Kazu, winter, no avijon can land in Belgrade, ice by air. And what does not land here in Palanka, to the gamers, fuck it! There is no ice because these fuzbalers from "Jedinstvo" all made. They are buzzing all day just to enter a low zone. I think that I'm asking the President of the Salet, for Dacu to land here on the players, but I'm embarrassed, I'm going to screw me over these mangups fuzbaleri. So, we're going without Dacu. I see; mrsava rabota. Where are we without Dacu to Belgrade? There's something to fuck. But the bus will not go away. Lale Sofer drove him through Sicevo. Strasko da te čuva; We will hide in Nisava in a tank. I look back at the bus, all of it fell asleep. And what will I do? I'll sleep and I'll fuck you mother! Not to look at how we're going to disappear. And I fell asleep and what am I going to dream of? Some caracondillary jurls through Belgrade, and Belgrade is still in the ruins of the bombing. I'm getting a caracondsule, and I can not get rid of the bus. Wake up. I got it all out. When that Nemanja dies like a donkey: "Belgrade, get ready for the people! Let's get it! And let's not get dressed."
I came to Belgrade. There at the Saint Sava, the Turks burnt him, there we will leave the bus. E Savo, Savo! We can not build a church for fifty years. Even Master Aca started to wallow and screwed up. Kazu, he was a mason. E, foreign, at the church, we leave the bus unfinished and we will go to Terazije sand. Kazu, it's not far. How many of the "Remizian" to our cemetery is Palanac. Dadose is not banners. Men give what "we love you." And now, again, suspicious work; that Nemanja's departure is going first, and the resilient President Sale is lagging behind. We are passing by a taxi driver, and he drew in a mysterious banner and spat on me: "Fuck you, sheep!" And now I think: how does he know that I have sheep? It must be that some Palancanin does not even write to me that I'm a shepherd! We are asking a militia for Terazija, and he hears, and he dares to shout. You see it's nice not to fuck. He will not even say Terazije. When, buckwheat, buckwheat, there, arrived at the Law Faculty. And there students. Who gathered for the Battle of Kosovo! Lele kolko gi ga ima! And now that fool Nemanja is right for her to say hello and together we go to Terazija to support this Naseg. When the Eyes! These did not bury the banners, then struck them on the hump, on the ribs, on the head. They do not watch de hit. Those who are crippled are craving. Who are we in other ears?

You fight, and women are not shabby with eggs. All my coats are twisted. My Kosara will not believe me that I was in Belgrade for a demonstration for Milosevic. To me, the Gypsy was found all the same shitty, and with the egg hit him in the eye to burn it, and he works at the factory "Bajram"; real jokes and squirrels. "Fuck you, Milosevic, they will burn me for him! Fuck your daily wages and dry wounds! Fuck you, Dragan, let me come to you to disappear!" I tell him: "Shut up, Found, if we have survived the Bulgarians and the Germans, we will survive the citizens of Belgrade! It is important that we do not hit us!" Is that Bosko getting started to get them back? You can not sit down when there's a lot of Siptari. And a little bit of a carpet, but there will be no water at Draskovic that he will even "climb". They run alongside the Assembly, as Master Aca says, when they got a safe at the SPS from Bamburek, and then they learn to swim in the fountain, but they are foolish. And this one from Bamburek learns to swim. Pliva, in front of Marx and English. So I'm saying to Najdana Giganin: "You see that from the worst and the worse. They just tricked us, and this one from Bamburek is bijene, he has to swim in December to the swoon!"
Dovedos is not near Draskovica. Twenty meters. And this Draskovic is standing under the monument to Mihail and his daughter, Sasa's eyes. And his voice was like eating from a watery stone. Those were at Kost Pecanac when he came to us to form a co-defendant battalion. The day is coming from the end: "This one will not have slaughtered like lambs!" And I tell him, "It will not be Found! It just looks like that!" And Nemanja does not say, "Build three fingers to stay alive!" And I also see our Salesman Sale Sale three fingers. We all dig it up. They do not baptize and let go. Kazu: "Let's go now to Terazije to your village!"
And, we came to Terazia. And, next to Milosevic, the police like you like! And I will, again, screw up to ask a policeman: "All right, bre, my friend, why do not you let them fight the ox?" And this one will ask me: "And where are you from your friend?" I tell him I'm from the White Palanka. And he will shake me in front of the whole society: "And which dick did you come to Belgrade when you are from Palanka? Do you want to get people from Belgrade to work?" And everyone hits the laugh. President Sale is laughing at us, and I'm begging him to catch him by the gus, and I'm rubbing him out of the gace of a little boy. I did not remember anything from Milosevic's speech. My head just passes through what the cops fuck me.
When the snore is back to the bus. When we have something to see. All windows are running. In the bus duo travels to Sicevack's gorge. Fuck you when I came to Belgrade, and when I heard about the rally and for Milosevic! We put the horns on the sofersaw, but the hole must be siphoned so that the driver can watch the driveway, that we do not leave, somewhere in the picking mother's way. Just do not need it yet! And buckwheat, buckwheat, we arrived somewhere, in the deaf age, at Palanka. The houses do not bother. Winter. Frost. Ape to the nose. We're freezing when we bloom.
And I'm thinking; I made a mistake. What the fuck I'll do to Belgrade when I'm not notified. Fuck you and the TV! I'll give it to the gypsy! Hey, there is so much that they do not lie in Dnevnik: "the stew of the students, the bunny of the demonstrators," and that whole Belgrade, on the other hand, was digging for Milosevic. To eat it! And he? What did He do to me? And is my brother on my wife? And who did I shoot to go to Belgrade? With Nemanja and Najdana? And from Salet? Fuck me Sale President! Should they be afraid of their fate in Belgrade, and who will win, we will vote. And this is the solution: with unverified people I will not go to the messenger anymore. Especially when it's a stupid torion.

 

underwear

Funny lyrics - Various funny lyrics

Turn the last page of the ID card. Read the text on the cursor by reading 'gace' instead of 'personal card':

- It is also the duty of every citizen older than 18 years to have a gag.

- The face can only have one gag.

- The owner of the pawn is obliged to carry the goggle on himself and to show them at the request of an official person authorized to legitimize.

- It is forbidden to give the gag another to the servant, to use other guts as their own, or to misuse them in any other way.

- A person whose shovel has changed so much that it does not match the grips of the guts or when changes in the length of the shit occur, within 15 days from the occurrence of the change, he / she submits the request for replacement of the guts.

- A person who loses or otherwise loses his gag is obliged to report it immediately, and within 15 days at the latest, to the Municipal Internal Affairs Authority and request the issuance of new packs.

WAS FROZEN F-117A

1. There was no fuel left2. Because it is invisible3. He stabbed him with stones4. Bird flew into the engine5. The pilot did not have a passport, so he sucked in to verify it6. The pilot staggered7. The NATO pilot's strike started8. Because the pilot is a Japanese and they are known as kamikaze9. When landing, he missed the airport in the summit10. Suddenly, his land was trampled on the road11. The Americans have sent us a half billion dollar humanitarian aid12. His tight sky was13. Dad, see without hands !!!14. What were the kids cheering !!15. He was stabbed between the mountains by the sword16. He called Pokoc to join him17. Because America likes hearts18. He did not have a pilot test19. Called him a woman on the cell20. He poured fuel on the street21. The Americans did not teach at school that they did not see the fox at night22. He wanted to pick up Ljubicicie23. He had Monika's picture in the cockpit and fell from the shame to the stick24. Soko video poker in action and wanted to learn something25. He wanted to buy cigars with an invisible dealer26. He frightened himself of the Seselj27. That they did not escape from the crowd?28. I sent his wolf token to get out.29. He went to the bathroom.30. He reached the post on the pager.31. He was thrown by the right-hand man, meaning that he must return home.32. The biologist told him he did not see the fox at night.33. He slept his glasses34. Clinton told him: Daaaa, put it down ...35. Zakat krililom for the cloud.36. He went to the mirror and saw it.37. The pilot was assigned.38. He sucked down to watch Esmeralda.39. The pilot tried the buttons.40. He drove a "trial" version, which was just gone.